|"Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's off to wo..."|
10,000 Hi Ho's
By John R Greenwood
*I did the math. From 1974 to 2012 I have been shrilled awake by an alarm clock approximately 10,000 times. I then shuffled to the shower, shaved, brushed my teeth, combed my hair, got dressed, and headed off to work. Unless that Powerball ticket hits I have at least another 2500 left; hopefully more. Work defines me. It does for many of us. I am not complaining. I am grateful that my father instilled a good work ethic in me. It has provided a home, and food on my table. Work initiated most of my current friendships. Labor in both collar colors, has kept me vital and engaged. I take pride in going to work. On the flip side; I, like most, have been known to do a little Yabba Dabba leaving the parking lot.
To show proof of my work history there is an accompanying photo of a little red note book with work documentation dating back as far as 1964. I would have been nine years old. Apparently on July 15th 1964 it took me four hours to feed Mr. & Mrs. Blodgett's cat. Well, maybe that was for the week? That works out to about a half hour opening, spooning, and arranging the cat's food each day. I probably provided some petting and small talk as part of my professional cat feeding skills. Then after several weeks riding my bike and collecting unemployment from mom, I spent a half hour helping Mrs. Dake clean lawn furniture in preparation for their summer guests. On August 4th I was hired by my grandmother next door. I probably mowed her lawn and did some trimming. That skill would serve me well for the next 50 years. On August 5th I worked a half hour somewhere? Maybe I planned to work somewhere? Maybe someone still owes me for that time? Let's see, 5o cents an hour plus interest?
*I could be off by as many as 5,000 as I was asleep during most of my math classes.